July 2017

Posted by: Amy Olshever | Categories: Newsletters

COPE Monthly Newsletter

July 2017

A grief and healing organization dedicated to helping parents and families living with the loss of a child.

 

The COPE July Newsletter includes:

 

Words from COPE President and Founder, Lilly Julien

 

COPE Healing Tip of the Month

 

Calendar of Events

 

Birthdays and Anniversaries

 

Our COPE Parent Column:

In Memory of Jaclyn Scarabino

In Memory of Heath Bogin

 

COPE News

 

Camp Erin® NYC – COPE Foundation

 

COPE Golf Outing Event

 

COPE Labyrinth

 

Support Group Meetings

 

Creative Writing Workshops

 

COPE Integrative Healing Workshops

 

Community Events

General Donations

Words from COPE President and Founder,

Lillian Julien

 

Dear COPE Families,

 

As I struggle to find my voice (due to a vocal chord problem), I am reminded of my loss for words after each of my devastating losses.

 

I had no voice to express my love, my anger, my pain.

 

I had no voice to respond to the thoughtless things that people said.

 

I had no voice to articulate my thoughts and feelings.

 

Summer brings with it many celebrations:  parties, barbecues, graduations, weddings, and holiday weekends. 

 

Finding your voice to say “No” to an invitation can be challenging. If you can find the strength to attend, find your voice when you’ve had enough and you’re ready to leave.

 

Grief and sadness increase stress, anxiety and vulnerability. And not having a voice is disempowering. 

 

Finding your voice will help people help you, and ultimately teach them to help others who are experiencing loss.

 

Express what you need and find the things in summer that bring you comfort. The beach, the flowers, the birds, the sunsets, whatever it may be…

 

I wish you peace and the little joys that bring you hope. 

 

 

Lilly

COPE President and Founder

lilly@copefoundation.org

 

 

To share your thoughts about this posting, please click here to visit our website and enter your comment under the LEAVE A REPLY section.

 

COPE Healing Tip of the Month

From COPE Clinical Director Amy Olshever, PhD, LCSW

 

 

How Do We Understand Grief?

 

What stage am I in? How long will this last? Why can’t I move to a better stage? When will I feel better? These are some of the many questions I have been asked by people who are grieving the loss of a loved one. To answer these questions we need a way to understand grief and the grieving process. Many of us first understood grief through Elisabeth Kubler-Ross’s five stages: Denial, Anger, Negotiation, Depression and Acceptance. Kubler-Ross was a great and wonderful pioneer in the world of grief and loss for bringing this difficult conversation into the open. But even she realized pretty early on that a stage theory does not really work to describe the messy and unique experiences that people really go through. 

 

There are several newer and more useful models to understand grief. One of these is William Worden’s TEAR Model. Worden suggests that there are four tasks we need to navigate through in the process of mourning. I like this model because it is flexible–you can adapt it to describe your individual situation, and it encourages you to take an active approach to your grieving process. It allows for the likely possibility that you may need to move backwards and forwards in the tasks. And it assumes that these tasks do not necessarily need to occur in the order that they are described here. However, as you will see, there is some natural order in that completion of some tasks presupposes completion of another task. Also, during the course of your lifetime some or all of these tasks may need to be revisited.

 

This month we focus on Task #1: To accept the reality of the loss

This task involves coming to terms with the end of the person’s life. It is not uncommon to experience shock or disbelief following a loss, or feel as if you are living in a dream or surreal reality. Your mind can easily pretend that the death didn’t really happen in an attempt to avoid the pain. You might continually expect your loved one to walk through the door, or be on the other end of the phone when it rings. You might keep telling yourself that this has to be a nightmare that you’ll soon wake up from.

 

To many, “acceptance” often implies agreement or approval. To others, “acceptance” may imply severing ties to the past. Acceptance doesn’t have to mean any of this. Rather, in the case of losing a loved one, acceptance may simply mark the moment we are ready to begin our journey of healing. Engaging in rituals such as funerals or writing a letter to the person who has died, or talking to a therapist or a close friend or family member are helpful ways to start to come to terms with the reality of the situation.

 

Next month we will look at Task #2…

 

 

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 July COPE Calendar of Events 

 

Workshops:

12     Wednesday: Integrative Healing Workshop: Healing the Grieving Spirit–

          East Meadow (COPE House 7:00pm – 8:30pm)  

18      Special Workshop: Coping after Suicide – East Meadow (COPE House,

          7:00pm – 8:30pm)  

19     Wednesday: Evening Writing Workshop  – East Meadow (COPE House,

          7:00m – 8:30pm)

22     Saturday: Daytime Writing Workshop  – East Meadow (COPE House,

          2:00pm – 3:30pm)

 

Support Groups:

6      Thursday: Syosset Established Parent Support Group – Syosset (Syosset Public

        Library, 7pm)

11    Tuesday: DAYTIME Parent Support Group – East Meadow (COPE

        House, 1pm)

11    Tuesday:  Grandparent Support Group – East Meadow (COPE House,

        6:30 pm)

12     Wednesday:  Western Suffolk County Parent Support Group – Dix Hills (Chai

        Center, 7pm)

14     Friday:  New York City Adult Sibling Group – (DASHA® Flagship, The

        Galleria, 115 East 57th Street, Suite 520, New York, NY, 10022, 6:15 pm-

        7:45 pm)   

17     Monday Night Parent Support Group for Parents New to COPE –

        East Meadow (COPE House, 7pm)

18     Tuesday: Long Island Adult Sibling Group – East Meadow (COPE House, 7pm)

19     Wednesday: DAYTIME Parent Support Group – East Meadow (COPE House,

        1pm)

20     Thursday: Jericho Support Group for Parents New to COPE – Jericho (Jericho

        Public Library, 7pm)

24     Monday: Parent Support Group Meeting – East Meadow (COPE House, 7:30pm)

28     Friday: Central Suffolk Parent Support Group Meeting – Ronkonkoma, 7:00pm)

 

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How You Can Help COPE Support Others:

Please Make a Donation Today

 

Please help COPE continue to provide support by making a donation.  Any donation can be made in tribute to a particular child or loved one.  To donate on line, please click here to visit our donation page www.copefoundation.org,  or you can send in a check to COPE at PO Box 1251 Melville, NY 11747.

 

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 AmazonSmile for COPE Foundation

With just one extra step, your purchase becomes meaningful… when ordering on Amazon by using amazonsmile and making COPE Foundation your charity of choice.   

Thank you!   

 

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COPE and Centering Corporation

COPE has partnered with the Centering Corporation to provide you with easy access to grief resources through our website. Centering Corporation is a non-profit organization dedicated to providing education and resources for the bereaved.  With resources on adult grief, death of a child, infant loss, children’s grief, as well as a host of grief-related products, Centering Corporation’s goal is, “We give you support.  We give you information.  We give you hope.”

 

You can easily access Centering Corporations vast array of resource from the home page of COPE’s website, the left or top tool bar where is says, “Grief Resource Center” or by clicking here.

 

When checking out on the Centering Corporation’s website, COPE hopes that you will enter the coupon code “COPE” where it asks for “Input Coupon or Promotional Code”. Doing so will enable 10% of your purchases to be directed back to COPE to help fund the grief support programs we offer parents, siblings and families living with the loss of a child.  COPE thanks you for your support.

 

If you have a book to recommend which you think will help our families along their path of healing, please email info@copefoundation.org

 

 

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Birthdays and Passings

 

In the month of July, we remember the following loved ones who were taken from us before their time:

 

1               Harley Bruce Jr. (“Dub”) (2005, Birthday) son of Harley Jesse &

                 Codi Dornan

                 Samantha Karolin (1988, Birthday) daughter of Mara Karolin

                 Paul Purcaro (1989, Birthday) son of Josephine Purcaro

                 Thomas Urraro (2011, Passing) son of Linda Amodio

                 Jennifer Taylor Bell (2009, Passing) daughter of Jane & Jonathan Bell

                 Frank Berin (2010, Passing) son of Diane Berin

                 Russell Ferber (2002, Passing) brother of Jordon Ferber

                 Michelle Nourmand (2014, Passing) daughter of Simin Nourmand , sister of

                 Joseph Nourmand

                 Naomi Popper (2009, Passing) daughter of Alex & Ronnie Popper

                 Christopher Procci (2012, Passing) brother of Kim Procci

                 Rosie Rafickrullah (2016, Passing) sister of Calvin Rafickrullah

2               Jared Kalensky (1979, Birthday) brother of Jana Diamond

                 Bryan Enczelewski (1969, Birthday) brother of Heather Enczelewski

                 Beth Adams (, Birthday) daughter of Becky Garduno

                 John Sopack (2013, Passing) son of Rosanna Sopack

                 Ariella Weiss (2007, Passing) daughter of Annette & Robert Weiss

3               Melissa Sue Bakker (1987, Birthday) daughter of Donna Bakker

                 Shana Kay (2005, Passing) daughter of Jane & Randy Kay

                 Gina Memoli (2015, Passing) daughter of Barbara & Mike Memoli

                 Luis Schwartz (2016, Passing) brother of Jen Schwartz and

                 Matthew Schwartz

4               Rebecca Goldstein (1991, Birthday) daughter of Rachel Goldstein-Florio

                 Corey Govier (1988, Birthday) son of Debbie Govier

                 Stacey Beth Kessler (1979, Birthday) daughter of Ronnie & Ira Kessler

                 Victoria Gaines (2012, Passing) daughter of Paul Gaines

5               Jeffrey Goldstein (1998, Passing) son of Sharon Cutler

                 Michael Mulhall (2010, Passing) son of Peggy Mulhall

                 Gabriel Pierro (2015, Passing) son of Fabian Pierro

6               Heath Bogin (1977, Birthday) son of Esther Bogin and son of Jerry Bogin

                 Robert Carpinelli (1990, Birthday) son of Linda Carpinelli

                 Nicholas Dempsey (1997, Birthday) son of Jennifer Dempsey

                 Victoria Gaines (2004, Birthday) daughter of Paul Gaines

                 Michael Isaacs (1991, Birthday) son of Cheryl Isaacs

                 Christopher Simpson (1977, Birthday) son of Kathy & Kenny Prisco

                 Nathan Allyn Sherman (1982, Birthday) son of Deborah Sherman

                 Chloe Weil (2014, Passing) daughter of Dina Weil

7               Jeff Reczkowski (1965, Birthday) brother of Rita O’Neill

                 Phoenix Anderson (2005, Passing) son of Linda Anderson

                 Rhonda (Reeva) Levine (2013, Passing) daughter of Carole Levine

                 Louie Manzella (2011, Passing) son of Nancy Manzella

                 Brian Pupke (2011, Passing) son of Robert & Heather Pupke

                 Hunter Wolfe (2011, Passing) son of Tony Wolfe

8               Luciano do Vale (1984, Birthday) brother of Lucimara Aguirre

                 Andrew Weiner (1969, Birthday) brother of Leslie Glick

                 Steven Kovacs (2009, Passing) son of Wayne & Elaine Kovacs, Joni Howe,

                 Michael Howe and Debra Mochado

                 Michael Klinofsky (2015, Passing) son of Jill Klinofsky

                 Dana Solomon (2010, Passing) son of Giovannina Leto

9               Gabrielle Azzarelli (1992, Birthday) daughter of Camille Azzarelli

                 Keith Costigan (1971, Birthday) son of Kathie Costigan

                 Samantha Blacharski (2015, Passing) daughter of Nancy Blacharski

                 Maureen Brack (2013, Passing) daughter of Anne Brack

                 Anna Finkelstein (2009, Passing) sister of Katherine Finkelstein

                 Kevin Naccary (2009, Passing) brother of Meredith Van Schuyler

                 Michael Litchford (2011, Passing) brother of Mollie Vigardt

10             Robert Julian White (2008, Passing) son of Cassandra King

                 Michael Salerno (2014, Passing) son of Patricia Salerno

                 Eric Strauss (2011, Passing) son of David Strauss

11              Patrick Joseph Carney, Jr. (1969, Birthday) husband of Dora Carney

                 Patrick Curley (1972, Birthday) son of MaryAnn Curley

                 Joshua Levi (1979, Birthday) son of Suzanne Levi

                 Frederick Drey Meine (1993, Birthday) son of Denise Meine-Graham

                 Mitchell Bauman (2005, Passing) son of Pearl & Leo Bauman

                 Wayne Lipinski (2010, Passing) son of Sue Lipinski

                 Paul Jacobson (2015, Passing) son of Diane Parini

12              Alexa Cardone (1999, Birthday) daughter of Nicole Cardone

                 Kevin Gilday (1955, Birthday) son of Eileen Gilday, brother of

                 Kathleen Harten

                 TerriAnn Clarke (1965, Birthday) daughter of Terry Hoffman

                 Cliff Leslie (1970, Birthday) son of Yvonne Leslie

                 Victoria Lamorta-Baumann (2009, Passing) daughter of Jean Germano

13              Harriet Patronis (1964, Birthday) daughter of Despina Koukoulas

                 Gwyn Sullivan (1973, Birthday) daughter of Joan Marlow

                 Adam Pomper (1993, Birthday) son of Bruce Pomper

                 Jim Connelly (2011, Passing) father of Samantha Connelly

                 Genovieve Soumia (2013, Passing) daughter of Ann Rickmeyer

                 Jaclyn Scarabino (2012, Passing) daughter of Diane & Robert Scarabino

14              Adam Spizz (1986, Passing) son of Alex Spizz and son of Marika Spizz,

                 brother of Jack & Kim Spizz

15             Hope Freed (1959, Birthday) daughter of Harriet & Bernard Shurgan

                 Monica Valencia (1976, Birthday) sister of Julianna Valencia

                 Diane Laraine Gordon (1979, Passing) sister of Laraine Gordon

16             Jennifer Jimenez (1987, Birthday) sister of Julianne Jimenez

                 Abigail Trent (1990, Birthday) daughter of Amy Persaud

                 Michael Bloomberg (2013, Passing) son of Sandi & Jerry Bloomberg

17              Kelly Burton (1985, Birthday) daughter of Cathy Burton

                 Jordyn Fisher (2011, Passing) daughter of Beth & Dick Fisher

                 Nathan Allyn Sherman (2003, Passing) son of Deborah Sherman

18             Dominic Amodeo (1988, Birthday) son of Jayne & Howie Goldberg

                 Jason Dacorta (2011, Passing) son of Joan Dacorta

                 Brittney Shulman (2015, Passing) daughter of Susan Shulman

                 Marci Reller (2009, Passing) daughter of Florence Weil

19              Russell Ciolli (1972, Birthday) son of Gloria & Bruce Ciolli

                 Michael DiMaria (1987, Birthday) son of Patti & Joseph DiMaria , brother of

                 Jennifer DiMaria

                 Brendon Redmond (1989, Birthday) son of Dori Redmond

                 John Sopack (1975, Birthday) son of Rosanna Sopack

                 Uzziah Taylor (1993, Birthday) son of Audrey Taylor

                 Victor Orlando Woolson (1993, Birthday) son of Teresa Woolsen

                 Justin Kostoff (2013, Passing) son of Lisa Alter

                 Scott Lundgren (2011, Passing) son of Anna & Ronald Lundgren

20             Kendra Bowers (1994, Birthday) sister of Kayla Bowers

                 Anthony Maletta (1969, Birthday) son of Eleanor DeFalco

                 Nicholas Ferrante (1992, Birthday) son of Jayne & Enrico Ferrante

                 Walter Allen Hardy, III (1984, Birthday) son of Delores Mower

                 Kaitlyn Dougherty (2013, Passing) daughter of Denise Dougherty

                 Sonia Dubey (2010, Passing) daughter of G and Mariam Dubey

                 Allison Jamie Schwartz (2010, Passing) daughter of Christopher Ihm

                 Tyler Pine (2011, Passing) son of Kathy & Craig Pine

21             Aidan Seeger (2004, Birthday) son of Elisa Seeger

                 Nikki Kontor (2010, Passing) daughter of Joann Lombardi

22             Cindy Behrmann-Veeder (2008, Passing) daughter of Sheila Behrmann

                 Amanda Henderson (2015, Passing) daughter of Denise Henderson, sister of

                 Jeanna Henderson

                 Shaun Singh (2014, Passing) son of Renoka Singh

23             Justin Kostoff (1992, Birthday) son of Lisa Alter

                 Seth Fink (1974, Birthday) son of Arlene Orth

                 Allison Morales (2004, Passing) daughter of Marsha Calderon

24             Rishi Prasad (1984, Birthday) son of Diana Allie

                 Barry Silverstein (1968, Birthday) son of Brenda Litzky

                 Sydney Gross (2009, Passing) daughter of Lori Duckstein

25             Billy Garfield (1978, Birthday) son of Roberta & Richie Garfield

                 Eric Licursi (1985, Birthday) son of Donna Licursi, brother of Lorraine Licursi

                 Brendon Bittner (1980, Birthday) brother of Jessica Markus

                 Eric Perrin (1979, Birthday) son of Barbara & Steven Perrin

                 Matthew Ravner (1988, Birthday) son of Louise & Jody Ravner

                 Nicholas Maniscalco (2014, Passing) son of Deborah Gibson

                 Caroline Swift (2014, Passing) daughter of Freddie Swift

26             JoAnna Falbo (1983, Birthday) sister of Juliana Falbo

                 Ariella Weiss (2005, Birthday) daughter of Annette & Robert Weiss

                 Adam Oberlander (2015, Passing) son of Carol and Norman Oberlander

27             Kyra Franchetti (2016, Passing) daughter of Jaqueline Franchetti

                 Mikaela Tick (2013, Passing) daughter of Jeffrey Tick

                 Gilad Vaday (2000, Passing) son of Sara & Shalom Vaday

28             Michael Zombeck (1984, Birthday) brother of Ricci Zombeck

                 Robert Egan (2014, Passing) son of Carla Egan

29             Vanessa Borg (1982, Birthday) daughter of Alice & Michael Borg

                 Howard Safir (2006, Passing) son of Lucy Safir

30             Tony Del Rio (1966, Birthday) son of Linda Marino

                 Mike Yedid (1990, Birthday) son of Elyse Yedid and Robert Yedid, brother of

                 Alan Yedid and David Yedid

31              Tyler Heelan (1990, Birthday) son of Leslie Heelan

                 Vanessa Borg (2006, Passing) daughter of Alice & Michael Borg

                 Peter Fedden (2013, Passing) brother of Jaimee Lee Fedden

 

 

 

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Parent Column

 

In Memory of Jaclyn Scarabino

 

Maybe other parents who have lost a precious child go through this too?

 

There is a certain point before her birthdate or anniversary of the day we lost our precious daughter when I begin to retrace every moment, every memory.

 

As I recall the days leading up to Jaclyn’s birth, June 13th, 1988, I’m filled with bittersweet happiness. I recall the fear and exultation because I was having my first! When they handed me this tiny person I cried happy tears and smiled but under that mask was a petrified new mother. Her Daddy and I  promised we would love her forever and try to be the best Mom & Dad. We celebrate every birthday with our Angel even though she has been in heaven almost five years. Jaclyn’s photo album, birth through year one comes out, we sit together and review all the wonderful moments from the start of her life. Balloons go up in the sky with notes of our love. It’s usually a day at the beach in her honor and a toast at her favorite restaurant.

 

It’s about now that I start to recall and retrace every step until the day she left us July 13th, 2012. Every day, every year is difficult. This will be the fifth year. Why does it hurt even more? The earth reminds me that day is approaching. It was hot, sunny, everything was green, flowers at their best. Summer plans being laid: concerts, beach, vacations, parties. My memories of her are heightened by my senses, when I hear her favorite music, taste her favorite summer drink, see the ocean, the touch of hot sand and the smell of coconut sun lotion. All reminders of Jaclyn. As it gets closer to the worst day I fall into myself, isolate, all the while wearing another mask. One of being ‘normal’ for everyone else. Everything I do on a daily basis without thought are now exhausting chores. All I want to do is sit on the couch. Why should I exist when my daughter doesn’t? I fear this date approaching every year. My brain wants to remain in the happy side that is prior July 2012, forever.  I can’t allow my brain to recall the moments of that worst day. That’s when my mind starts reeling to a bad place. A place of, I shudda, wudda, cudda…Panic sets in as the actual day nears, my heart pounds and our family retreats to their corners for survival. We grieve differently but always ready to support each other. I leave our home before the anniversary of our worst day. It’s still too much to bear. I fear that familiar huge wave will crash over my head and drown me as memories flood my brain. My daughter would not want me to be home, in the actual footprints of that day.

 

Of course, Jaclyn is a part of my heart, my mind and my body every day. Many places in our home remain in 2012. Her pictures on the refrigerator, the recipe for biscuits she wrote, the basket filled with cards from her funeral, her keychain on the table near the front door, her cigarette butts still in the sand bucket out front.  Missing her so much and recognizing the span of time is surreal. I see the tree planted in her garden a week after the worst day. It was a gift from someone who loved her. It was a twig, now it’s almost four feet tall. This mark of time equals confusion and gut wrenching physical pain of my heart. When I see her friends marrying and having children, it’s a mark of time. Her brothers maturing and draw strength from her spirit with hope for their future. When I look at my reflection in the mirror,  I don’t recognize myself. So, I enter her bedroom and stay back in 2012 and feel comfort. Clinging to her things, feels so good and that’s okay for now. It’s my way of staying close to my daughter. My thinking she’s not home right now, that’s okay too.

 

I think all parents hold our beliefs differently yet we all share a bond that is a broken heart. My husband and I lean on each other just as all our friends from COPE lean on each other. Healing is a tough journey. I don’t think I am healing until I retrace the days of her first year in heaven. I can see how different I am. I take solace in that. It gives me confidence that I can face another day without my precious child.

 

I believe she is with me every second. There is more to this world than we are allowed to understand. I look forward to the day I see her, touch her hand, smell the nap of her neck, taste the sweet essence of her breath and hear her voice once again say “I love you Mommy”. 

 

All my love is with you my darling daughter Jaclyn

 

Love Always & Forever,

Mom, Dad, Ricky & Michael

 

(Diane Scarabino)

 

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Parent Poem

 

In Memory of Heath Bogin

 

They Tell Me

   By Esther Bogin

    Heath’s Mom

Songs-Pictures-Thoughts-Memorabilia-Reminders-Reminders.

They tell me “time heals everything.”

Movies – the tears – TV shows – the sobs – the quiet, alone moments.

They tell me “time helps you to deal better.”

Holidays – celebrations – birthdays – the bittersweet in my enjoyment.

They tell me “in time it will get easier.”

New memories – plans for tomorrow – family – friends – the void, the empty space.

They tell me “in time it gets deeper.”

The should-be’s – the could have been’s – the why’s – the wish to go back in time.

They tell me “time doesn’t take the pain away, it just takes longer for it to come out.”

They tell me so many words;  all with good intention;  so many words that I really don’t remember.

When they say time heals everything,  I want to ask them “how?”    How can time heal missing you?  How can time heal my wishing you were here?  How can time heal the hurt knowing that I am living without you with me?    How can time do all of that?  How can time do all of that?

Time may heal everything- just not loving you, my sweet son.

 

Please share with us your writings about your child.  Email info@copefoundation.org for more information.

 

 

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COPE News

 

The excitement is building…the Golf Outing is July 31st!

Please be a part of this amazing day in whatever way you can!

( click here to see all your options)

 

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SAVE THE DATE!

The COPE Walk is September 24th!!!!

This is the event all our families look forward to participating in. We look forward to seeing you there!

 

 

 

If anyone has any news to share with the group or a poem or inspirational story (to potentially be included in a future newsletter if you wish), please email info@copefoundation.org.

 

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Camp Erin® New York City – COPE Foundation

COPE’s Bereavement Camp for Children Ages 6 – 17 

August 25 – 27, 2017

 

Happy July 4t

h!

 

Only a month out and we are in the last stages of planning for camp. Our enrollment has increased, so thanks for spreading the word. Lots of families with multiple children taking advantage of an incredible weekend filled with hope, love and support.

 

With the world around us seeming a little crazy at times, it is comforting to know that for a weekend, at least, everyone at Camp Erin NYC is channeling their thoughts, energy and compassion into children who really need a focus and a glimmer of hope that there can be sunshine in their world again. Children leave with strategies to make that happen, which inspires us to do the work  we do and help those children that are brave enough to come to camp.

 

Would love to chat, but have to prepare for camp. Have a wonderful summer! Enjoy each moment and stop and smell the roses…. or the BBQ!

 

EVERYONE IS EXCITED FOR CAMP!

Camp Hugs,

Ann

 

 

For more information on Camp Erin, please email COPE-Camp Erin New York City Camp Director Ann Fuchs at afuchs@copefoundation.org or 914-552-6919.

 

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COPE Golf Outing 2017

***RESCHEDULED DUE TO WEATHER***

New Date: Monday, July 31st

 

Join us on July 31st…

 

COPE’s 11th Annual Golf Outing Honors Karen Flyer, Former Executive Director, COPE Parents Jane & Jon Bell, and Dr. Amy Gross, Founding Clinical Director of Camp Erin NYC, Monday, July 31, 2017 at the Muttontown Club in East Norwich, NY

Please REGISTER. Sponsorship opportunities are open.

The COPE Golf Outing is a great opportunity for individuals, organizations and COPE families to support our mission and honor your child, sibling or loved one, as well as our Honorees.

Monies raised from the event will fund COPE’s programming: support groups, workshops, and Camp Erin® NYC (August 25-27, 2017).

If you wish to become an Individual or Corporate Sponsor, or take a Tee Sign, click here.

If you have any questions about registration and sponsorship opportunities, please contact Lynda Rice, COPE Administrative Director (lynda@copefoundation.org)

If you would like to volunteer on the day of the outing, contact Lynda.

Memorial opportunities are available to honor your child, sibling, or loved one with a tee sign.

 

How You Can Help:

  • VOLUNTEER to work at the Golf Outing (shifts available from 9am-9pm).
  • PLAY GOLF
  • ATTEND OUR COCKTAIL HOUR & DINNER to celebrate our Honorees.
  • PARTICIPATE in the Chinese Auction at the event.
  • DONATE: Make a general donation to COPE (stock transfers are an option).
  • ENCOURAGE friends and family to attend, support or donate to the event.

 

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COPE Labyrinth

 

COPE is now accepting memorial brick and bench orders for our next installation (specific date to be announced).

 

 

Next to the rose garden, in the Memorial Plaza of Eisenhower Park, is the beautiful and peaceful Labyrinth. Consider honoring your loved one with an engraved brick or bench in this special location.

 

 

Memorial bricks are $200 and can include up to

3 lines of engraving, 14 characters per line.

A worksheet is available to help you with your character spacing. 

 

 

To place a brick order, please print this form & mail with a check to:

COPE

PO Box 1251

Melville, NY 11747

 

Should you have any questions, please contact Lynda at Lynda@copefoundation.org.

 

About COPE Labyrinth:

COPE Foundation now has a permanent memorial labyrinth in Eisenhower Park’s Memorial Plaza, with bricks and benches dedicated to our children, siblings, and loved ones.

The labyrinth is an ancient symbolic path with healing and spiritual significance. It has been used within many cultures and spiritual traditions throughout the world.

For many, labyrinths represent life’s journey or spiritual pilgrimage.

Walking the labyrinth often produces a calming, centering feeling. This alternating balancing motion can quiet one’s body, mind and spirit, often inducing a receptive state for meditation and contemplation in the center of the labyrinth.

 

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COPE Monday Night South Shore Parent Support Group

 

The Merrick Support group is changing location to the Oceanside JCC in  Long Beach. Groups will resume in the new location in September.

 

 

Details for this group and location coming soon!

 

 

For more information, please email info@copefoundation.org.

 

 

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COPE Monday Night Parent Support Group for

Parents New to COPE-East Meadow 

COPE House at Eisenhower Park in East Meadow (Field 6A)  

Monday, June 17th, 7:00- 8:30 p.m.  SHARP

 

The Monday night COPE North Shore group for parents NEW TO COPE will be facilitated by Marilyn Kohn, LCSW, and will be held at the COPE House in Eisenhower Park, East Meadow NY at Field 6A.  For directions, please visit our website at www.copefoundation.org.

 

For more information, please email info@copefoundation.org.

 

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Tuesday DAYTIME Parent Support Group

COPE House at Eisenhower Park in East Meadow (Field 6A)

Tuesday, June 11th, 1:00 – 2:30 p.m. SHARP

 

The DAYTIME Parent Support Group is facilitated by licensed social worker Janet Zimmerman. Janet is currently in private practice as a psychotherapist.  She previously ran bereavement groups for the Mid-Island JCC and has been a social worker for almost 40 years.  For more information or to express your interest, please contact Amy Olshever, COPE Clinical Director, at 516-418-6606.

 

 

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COPE Thursday Night North Shore Parent Support Group for Parents New to COPE – Jericho

Jericho Library

Thursday, June 20th,  7:00 – 8:30 p.m.  SHARP

 

Parents NEW TO COPE, please join us for our North Shore Parent Support Group meeting at the Jericho Public Library (1 Merry Lane in Jericho).

 

This group, which meets monthly, is facilitated by Marilyn Kohn, LCSW, a licensed social worker with a private practice specializing in bereavement counseling and individual and family therapy. This is for parents NEW TO COPE, as Marilyn’s other Thursday and Monday groups are filled at this time.

 

For more information or to express your interest, please contact COPE Clinical Director Amy Olshever at 516-418-6606.

 

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COPE Monday Night Parent Support Group-East Meadow

COPE House at Eisenhower Park (Field 6A)

Monday, June 24th,  7:30 – 9:00 p.m.  SHARP

 

The Monday night COPE North Shore group will meet this month. This group will be facilitated by Marilyn Kohn, LCSW, and will be held at the COPE House in Eisenhower Park, East Meadow NY at Field 6A.  For directions, please visit our website at www.copefoundation.org.  This group is for parents who have been part of COPE.  New to COPE parents should plan on attending the meeting for Parents NEW to COPE.

 

For more information, please email info@copefoundation.org.

 

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Wednesday Night Western Suffolk County Parent Support Group

The Chai Center in Dix Hills

Wednesday, June 12th, 7:00 – 8:30 p.m. SHARP

 

Please join COPE and social worker Denise Fields for our Parent Support Group in Suffolk County, at the Chai Center in Dix Hills (501 Vanderbilt Parkway). Denise has a private psychotherapy practice in Dix Hills, specializing in bereavement.  She previously was a consultant to the Huntington School district, and ran bereavement groups for the Family Service League in Huntington.  

 

For more information, please email info@copefoundation.org.

 

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Wednesday DAYTIME Parent Support Group – East Meadow-

COPE House at Eisenhower Park in East Meadow (Field 6A)

Wednesday, June 19th, 1:00 – 2:30 p.m. SHARP

 

The DAYTIME Parent Support Group, will meet on the third Wednesday of the month at the COPE House at Eisenhower Park (Field 6A) in East Meadow. The group is open to all current members and new members. The group is facilitated by licensed social worker Janet Zimmerman. Janet is currently in private practice as a psychotherapist.  She previously ran bereavement groups for the Mid-Island JCC and has been a social worker for almost 40 years.  For more information or to express your interest, please contact Amy Olshever, COPE Clinical Director, at 516-418-6606.

 

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COPE Thursday Night North Shore Parent Support Group for Established Parents

Syosset Library

Thursday, June 6th, 7:00 – 8:30 p.m. SHARP

 

Join COPE for our Two-Year Plus North Shore Parent Support Group meeting at the Syosset Public Library (225 So. Oyster Bay Road).

 

COPE will once again be joined by Marilyn Kohn, LCSW, a licensed social worker with a private practice specializing in bereavement counseling and individual and family therapy.  This is a group intended for parents whose loss occurred over two years ago.  Newly bereaved parents should feel free to attend one of COPE’s other support groups.

 

For more information, please email info@copefoundation.org.

 

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Grandparents Support Group 

COPE House at Eisenhower Park in East Meadow (Field 6A)

Tuesday, June 11th, 2017, 6:30 – 8:00 pm

 

The Grandparents Support Group is for bereaved parents who have lost adult children with children. This group will be facilitated by Lisa Vitucci. Parents will discuss the dynamics involved in dealing with grandchildren and their surviving parent, can share their stories and discuss issues they may have in this different family relationship. Suggestions can be made as to how to deal with these issues. Lisa has more than ten years’ experience as a bereavement social worker for a hospice agency and is currently the Director of Social Work at ProHEALTH Care Support. Lisa can be reached with any questions at 516-808-5821.

 

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Friday Night Central Suffolk County Parent Support Group-Ronkonkoma

United Methodist Church in Ronkonkoma

Friday, July 28th, 7:00 – 8:30 p.m.

 

Please join COPE and social worker Lisa Vitucci for our Central Suffolk County Parent Support Group at the United Methodist Church in Ronkonkoma (792 Hawkins Avenue Lake Grove, NY 11755, 631-588-5856).  Lisa has more than ten years’ experience as a bereavement social worker for a hospice agency and is currently the Director of Social Work at ProHEALTH Care Support.  Lisa can be reached with any questions at 516-808-5821. 

 

For more information or to express interest in this group, please email info@copefoundation.org.

 

 

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COPE Teen Grief Support Group (Ages 13-17)

COPE House in East Meadow (Field 6A in Eisenhower Park)

***Check back for the dates of our fall session*** 

 

Teens that have lost a sibling, parent, or significant loved one, please join COPE for our teen grief support group. The group is facilitated by Lauren Jukosky, LCSW.  Lauren recently served as a pediatric oncology social worker for the Steven & Alexandra Cohen Children’s Medical Center of New York where she provided supportive counseling and assisted families with understanding medical diagnoses and specialized in end-of-life counseling.  She also was a social worker at the New York Eye & Ear Infirmary in New York, and a group facilitator at the Center for HOPE (where she conducted bereavement support groups for bereaved children).

 

The Spring Session of our COPE Teen Grief Support Group  meets the second Thursday evening of every month at 7:30 p.m. at the COPE House in East Meadow, and will run for 7 weeks. Please express your interest to Clinical Director Amy Olshever at 516-418-6606. 

 

There is no cost to participate in this program. 

 

 

 

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Long Island Adult Sibling Group-East Meadow

COPE House at Eisenhower Park  (Field 6A)

Tuesday, June 18th, 7:00 – 8:30 p.m. 

 

Please join COPE for our adult sibling group on Long Island at the COPE House in East Meadow.  For directions, please visit our website at www.copefoundation.org.  The group will be facilitated by licensed social worker Amy Kirschenblatt.  Amy is a social worker at Cohen’s Children’s Medical Center.  Previously, she worked in a prenatal care program at NSHS/LIJ.

 

 For more information, please email info@copefoundation.org.

 

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NYC Parent Support Group

On Hiatus

1177 Ave of Americas (@ 46th st.)

 

The New York City parent group, facilitated by social worker Bridgette Boucher, which met on the second Tuesday of every month at 1177 Avenue of the Americas at 46th Street floor C-2, Suite 0020 from 7:00-8:30 p.m. is CURRENTLY ON HIATUS awaiting additional interest. If you know of anyone interested in this group, please contact COPE Clinical Director Amy Olshever at amyolshever@copefoundation.org.

 

Bridgette is currently a family therapist working with the Sloan Kettering Cancer Center and has a private practice in New York City. She was previously a therapist for the Ackerman Institute for the Family, treating families dealing with grief, substance abuse, domestic violence, trauma and relationship problems. For more information please contact Bridgette at boucher9175@gmail.com.

 

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NYC Adult Sibling Support Group

DASHA® Flagship, The Galleria, 115 East 57th Street, Suite 520

New York, NY, 10022

Friday, June 14th, 6:15 – 7:45 pm

 

We are pleased to announce that we will have restarted the NYC Adult sibling group at DASHA® Flagship, The Galleria, 115 East 57th Street, Suite 520, Manhattan.   

 

The group will be facilitated by one of our own Camp Erin Grief Chiefs, Jonathan Glotzer.  Jonathan has been practicing psychotherapy in the New York City area for over 17 years and is currently a Behavioral Health consultant for a private Human Resource consulting firm. He was also a clinical social work supervisor for both acute psychiatric inpatient and psychiatric emergency room services for Health and Hospitals Corporations (HHC), a NYC network of hospitals. Jonathan holds a B.A. in psychology from Binghamton University and a Master’s of Social Work from Adelphi University. He currently is a Licensed Clinical Social Worker in the State of New York and has a private psychotherapy practice in the Chelsea section of NYC providing Cognitive Behavioral Therapy to adults and adolescents.

 

This group will meet monthly on the 2nd Friday of the month.

 

For more information, please email info@copefoundation.org.

 

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COPE  Young Children’s Grief Support Group (Ages 7-12)

On Hiatus

COPE House in East Meadow (Field 6A in Eisenhower Park)

 

The NEW Children’s Grief Support Group for kids ages 7-12 living with the loss of a loved one is on hiatus awaiting additional interest. If you are interested in your child joining an 8-week spring group, please contact COPE Clinical Director Amy Olshever at 516-418-6606 or amyolshever@copefoundation.org.

 

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Creative Writing Workshops

COPE House in Eisenhower Park

Evening: Wednesday, July 19th, 7:00 – 8:30p.m.

Daytime: Saturday, July 22nd, 2:00 – 3:30 p.m. 

 

Please join COPE and Patty Rossi, published writer, to experience the power of the pen as a source of solace and comfort in the grieving process. These workshops will be devoted to writing and healing. Be part of this artistic venture. Come explore writing as a tool to console and soothe.  

 

Please RSVP to Patty at pattyed1@verizon.net if you are interested in attending.

 

For more information, email info@copefoundation.org.

 

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Monthly Meditation/Integrative Healing Workshops

 

Healing the Greiving Spirit

COPE House at Eisenhower Park in East Meadow (Field 6A)

Wednesday, July 12th, 7:00 pm  to  8:30 pm

 with Yvonne Tinsley

 

 

Please join Yvonne Tinsley, LMSW, CASAC, for a two-hour workshop: “Restoring a GrievingSpirit.”

Each workshop participant will:

 

  • Learn a comprehensive framework for understanding loss and bereavement.
  • Acquire concrete and practical tools for helping parents live with the loss of a child
  • Develop an understanding of the phenomena of spiritual identity
  • Discover the process of “restoring a grievingspirit”

 

 Please RSVP by email to: amyolshever@copefoundation.org

 

 

For more information on Yvonne’s work visit The American Center for Holistic Wellness at www.tacfhw.com

 

__________________________________________________________________________________

 

SPECIAL WORKSHOP: Coping After Suicide 

COPE House at Eisenhower Park in East Meadow (Field 6A)

Tuesday, July 18th, 7:00pm – 8:30pm

with Joanne L. Harpel, MPhil, JD

 

Have you lost a child or sibling to suicide?     

 

Are you reliving those last days (or weeks or months or even years), trying to make sense out of it and asking “why” over and over again?

 

Do you wonder whether you missed something? Or worry about something you might have said or done (or didn’t say or do)?

 

Do you feel alone, misunderstood, blamed, or judged?

 

Are you worrying about other people in your family?

 

Join Joanne L. Harpel, MPhil, JD, President of Coping After Suicide, a national authority on suicide bereavement and the survivor of her own brother’s suicide, for an adults-only open forum to address all of the emotions, concerns, and fears that inevitably arise after a suicide.  Have your questions answered and get reliable information, guidance, and reassurance.

 

 

 

 

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Integrative Healing Workshop Series 

Nia Dance

COPE House at Eisenhower Park in East Meadow (Field 6A) 

 

Rescheduled for August 3rd!

 

 

 

 

If you have any questions call

Clinical Director, Amy Olshever at 516-418-6606

 

 

 

 

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COPE Individual Peer Support/Mentor

Sign up to be a Peer Mentor or for Peer Support

 

For those bereaved parents and siblings not ready for a support group, or who wish to augment their support group experience with individual support, COPE offers “peer mentor support.”  If you are in need of a peer mentor (a parent or sibling who shares your particular loss), OR if you wish to act as a peer mentor to a newly bereaved parent or sibling, please contact info@copefoundation.org.  Peer support is truly at the heart of COPE!

 

 

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Community Events

 

Please contact info@copefoundation.org with any community healing events to list in our newsletter.

 

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COPE General Donations

We thank the following people for making donations to COPE during the months of (late) May and June:

 

General Donations:

Patricia Geyer                     

Lisa & Daniel Doll      

Benjamin & Sara Diamond                  

Diane & Robert Scarabino In Memory Of Jaclyn Scarabino  

Barbara & Barry Krumholtz In Memory Of Michelle Julien, Robert Julien 

         “Our thoughts and love are always with them”    

 

 

Camp Erin: 

Arlene Haims In Honor Of Heath’s Mom, Esther Bogin

Sandy and Steve Cohen In Memory Of Elsie Landau

Jill Burgreen & Strahl In Honor Of Heath’s mom, Esther Bogin

Deborah Kilmnick In Honor Of Heath’s mom, Esther Bogin

Greer and Billy Slovin In Honor Of “Heath’s Mother, Esther Bogin”

Marilyn Curry In Honor Of Heath’s Mom, Esther Bogin

Christina Godfrey In Honor Of Heath’s mom, Esther Bogin

Lilly Julien                  

Ilona Musen In Memory Of Heath Bogin

Deborah A O’Connor

 

 

COPE would also like to express our appreciation for all the generous support of our Golf Outing, which will be acknowledged individually. THANK YOU!

 

  

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