End Of Year

Posted by: The Real Dave O. | Categories: Healing Tip of the Month

You know this is not an easy time of year, but remember, there is no right or wrong way to get through the holiday season. Everyone is different and has a different/unique way they express their grief as well as their joy. It’s a good idea to get in touch with yourself to understand how you express what you are feeling. Most of all, give yourself permission to feel however you feel, acknowledge and accept your feelings and be gentle with yourself.

For the Newsletter and or letter to whole family database with well wishes from COPE.

You know this is not an easy time of year, but remember, there is no right or wrong way to get through the holiday season. Everyone is different and has a different/unique way they express their grief as well as their joy. It’s a good idea to get in touch with yourself to understand how you express what you are feeling

  1. Most of all, give yourself permission to feel however you feel, acknowledge and accept your feelings and be gentle with yourself.
  2. Set realistic expectations for yourself.

It’s okay not to accept all invitations you get, it’s ok to do things differently than you have in the past

  1. Manage the anticipation.

Often times the anticipation is worse than the day itself.

  1. Have an escape strategy.

You may want to take your own car so if you want to go home, you have the option to escape.

  1. Inventory your holiday traditions.

Think about your family’s holiday traditions and only focus on what’s really necessary to you and your family.

  1. It is ok to talk with others about your loved ones and your experience.

You may feel that others don’t want to talk about your child or sibling. But they may be thinking the same thing about you. You can give your family permission to honor your child’s memory.

  1. Engage in self-care.

Do something for yourself that makes you feel good, exercise, get a massage, read a book, spend time with a friend, or whatever it is that helps you feel relaxed.

  1. Evaluate your coping plans.

Do your plans isolate you from those who love and support you best?

Do your plans allow for meaningful expression and celebration of what the particular holiday means to you?

  1. Don’t be afraid to have fun.

Enjoyment and laughter are not expressions in which you abandon your child who died. Allow yourself and your family to enjoy the holiday without feeling guilty; your child wouldn’t want you to be sad forever.

  1. Attend a support group or workshop.

Talking to others who also experienced the death of a child can help you understand that you are not alone. Others have survived the holidays and you will too.

 

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