May 2016 Newsletter

Posted by: Adam Rabinovitch | Categories: Newsletters

COPE May Newsletter

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Words from COPE President and Founder Lilly Julien

After a month of holidays, (Easter and Passover) with Mother’s Day approaching, I feel compelled to share what has offered me hope through the agonizing loss of my daughter. It is the realization that relationships continue beyond death. As Morrie said in the book, Tuesdays With Morrie, “Death ends a life not a relationship”.

It’s taken me many years to develop this new relationship that is very different from the one we knew when my daughter was physically present. I had to find a new relationship with myself and with my daughter, Michelle. I needed to find a way to feel Michelle present in my life in order to go on living. It was unfamiliar and challenging to grasp, but eventually became a way of life. How powerful it is to realize that the relationship with the one you love can exist beyond time and dimension.

At first, I opened myself to the possibility, and then began to believe it possible. I searched for “signs,” not only as proof that her soul existed, but for the connection I yearned to feel from the “messages”. This was the beginning of our new relationship. I did things she liked to do. I ate her favorite foods. I valued all that she taught me. I carried her inside me—in my heart, my mind, my soul—until I birthed this new relationship. And over the years, I have reinvented our relationship.

What I’ve learned from my own experience and from the experience of many other bereaved parents whom I’ve met through COPE is that it’s up to us to cultivate a new relationship with our child. After our children are no longer physically present, they still exist in our hearts, minds, and imaginations. Cultivating that relationship empowers us when we feel the most helpless and powerless. The more we can cultivate that relationship, the more present they’ll feel in our lives.

We are forever surrounded by the energy of love and that cherished connection to our child.

Lilly

COPE President and Founder

Ljulien5@gmail.com

To share your thoughts about this posting, please click here to visit our website and enter your comment under the LEAVE A REPLY section


COPE Healing Tip of the Month

From COPE Clinical Director Amy Olshever, PhD, LCSW

On the anniversary of traumatic events, people often find that they experience an increase in distressing memories of the event. When you have lost a child or a sibling these memories may be triggered by reminders you are aware of, but they may also seem to come from out of the blue. This “anniversary reaction” is a normal and often expected part of the bereavement process. It can range from feeling mildly upset for a day or two to a more extreme reaction in which you might experiences significant symptoms. Here are five things you can do to help you prepare as the date approaches.

  1. Take the day off—you may take off from work or from your regular routine. Give yourself permission to make the day different.
  2. Plan a ritual to acknowledge your lost loved one—light candles, plant flowers, release balloons, eat their favorite meal or anything that helps you focus on the important part they play in your life.
  3. Put a few trusted people on call—You know who your go-to people are. Warn them that you may need a little more TLC on this day.
  4. Write a letter to you lost loved one—Some people write a letter every year and it is a part of their ongoing rituals. Some people write once, and appreciate the catharsis. Find what works for you.
  5. Let the rituals evolve—give yourself permission to repeat those things that work and try new ones as you proceed through your grief journey. The date may be the same each year but you are always changing and your needs and rituals may change, too.

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Please Support our Organization

Please help COPE continue to provide support by making a donation. Any donation can be made in tribute to a particular child or loved one. To donate on line, please click here to visit our donation page www.copefoundation.org, or you can send in a check to COPE at P.O. Box 1251, Melville, NY 11747. COPE thanks you for your support.

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May COPE Calendar of Events (see details below)

May Support Groups:

2         Monday: South Shore Parent Support Group – Merrick (Merrick Jewish Center, 7pm)

2         Monday Night Parent Support Group for Parents New to COPE – East Meadow (COPE House, 7:00pm)

3         Tuesday: DAYTIME Parent Support Group – East Meadow (COPE House, 1pm)

10       Tuesday: Grandparent Support Group – East Meadow (COPE House, 6:30pm)

11       Wednesday: Western Suffolk County Parent Support Group – Dix Hills (Chai Center, 7:00pm)

12       Thursday: North Shore Parent Support Group for Parents New to COPE – Jericho

(Jericho Public Library, 7:00pm)

12       Thursday: Teen Grief Support Group – East Meadow (COPE House, 7:00pm)

16       Monday: Parent Support Group Meeting – East Meadow (COPE House, 7:30pm)

19       Thursday: North Shore Parent Support Group for Established Parents – Syosset (Syosset Public Library, 7:00pm)

20       Friday: Central Suffolk County Parent Support Group – Ronkonkoma (United Methodist Church, 7:00pm)

31       Tuesday: Long Island Adult Sibling Group – East Meadow (COPE House: 7:00pm)

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Poem 

We Remember Them

In the rising of the sun and in its going down,
 We remember them;

In the blowing of the wind and in the chill of winter,
 We remember them;

In the opening of the buds and in the warmth of summer,
We remember them;

In the rustling of leaves and the beauty of autumn,
We remember them;

In the beginning of the year and when it ends,
We remember them;

When we are weary and in need of strength,
We remember them;

When we are lost and sick of heart,
We remember them;

When we have joys we yearn to share,
We remember them;

So long as we live, they too shall live, 
For they are now a part of us, as 
We remember them.

— From Gates of Prayer 

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COPE Book Corner

Full Catastrophe Living: Using the Wisdom of Your Body and Mind to Face Stress, Pain, and Illness

by Jon Kabat-Zinn

The landmark work on mindfulness, meditation, and healing, now revised and updated after twenty-five years…

Stress. It can sap our energy, undermine our health if we let it, even shorten our lives. It makes us more vulnerable to anxiety and depression, disconnection and disease. Based on Jon Kabat-Zinn’s renowned mindfulness-based stress reduction program, this classic, groundbreaking work—which gave rise to a whole new field in medicine and psychology—shows you how to use medically proven mind-body approaches derived from meditation and yoga to counteract stress, establish greater balance of body and mind, and stimulate well-being and healing. By engaging in these mindfulness practices and integrating them into your life from moment to moment and from day to day, you can learn to manage chronic pain, promote optimal healing, reduce anxiety and feelings of panic, and improve the overall quality of your life, relationships, and social networks. This second edition features results from recent studies on the science of mindfulness, a new Introduction, up-to-date statistics, and an extensive updated reading list. Full Catastrophe Living is a book for the young and the old, the well and the ill, and anyone trying to live a healthier and saner life in our fast-paced world.

If you have a book to recommend which you think will help our families along their path of healing, please email Stacey at scareri@copefoundation.org.

COPE and Centering Corporation

COPE has partnered with the Centering Corporation to provide you with easy access to grief resources through our website. Centering Corporation is a non-profit organization dedicated to providing education and resources for the bereaved. With resources on adult grief, death of a child, infant loss, children’s grief, as well as a host of grief-related products, Centering Corporation’s goal is, “We give you support. We give you information. We give you hope.”

You can easily access Centering Corporations vast array of resource from the home page of COPE’s website, the left or top tool bar where is says, “Grief Resource Center”.

When checking out on the Centering Corporation’s website, COPE hopes that you will enter the coupon code “COPE” where it asks for “Input Coupon or Promotional Code”. Doing so will enable 10% of your purchases to be directed back to COPE to help fund the grief support programs we offer parents, siblings and families living with the loss of a child. COPE thanks you for your support.

COPE has published its very own Kindle book on how bereaved parents can COPE with their loss! The Kindle book, “COPING WITH THE LOSS OF A CHILD: Strategies for Living with Loss & How Friends Can Help” is available on Amazon.

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Birthdays & Passings

In the month of May, we remember the following loved ones who were taken from us before their time:

1    Stuart Gruskin (2009, passing), son of Renee Gruskin

     Michelle Nardone (2008, passing), daughter of Nick Nardone

     Michael Aaron Neeley (1981, birthday), son of Joy Neeley

     Peter Kaliscik (2013, passing), son of Carol & Peter Kaliscik

     Thomas Yates (2014, passing), son of Lillian & David Yates

     Daniel Aquila (2015, passing), son of Judy Aquila

     Kelly Georgens (2015, passing), sister of Allison Georgens Costello

     Eric Rattinger (1965, birthday), son of Anne Rattinger

2    Rachel Anolik-Petrsoric (2007, passing), daughter of David and Rose Anolik, sister of Jill Anolik Sokoloff

      William Laube (1989, birthday), son of Beth & William Laube, brother of Christina Laube

      Sydney Gross (1990, birthday), daughter of Lori Duckstein, sister of Stephanie and Stuart Gross

David Mannino (1981, birthday), son of Linda Mannino

3    Adam Stark (1982, birthday), son of Candice & Jeff Stark, sister of Mariel Stark

Jesse Radowitz (1977, birthday), son of Sherry & Stu Radowitz

Joe Marino (1994, birthday), son of Diane Marino

Pauline Nemati (2015, passing), daughter of Mitra & Iradj Nemati

4    Jordana Arin Cooper (1974, birthday), sister of Jason Cooper

Patrick Murphy (2013, passing), son of Karen Murphy

Patrick Joseph Carney, Jr. (2015, passing), husband of Dora Carney

Deborah Barnes (2012, passing), daughter of Marcia & Frank Jedzrowski

5    Matthew Lichten (1996, passing), son of Eric Lichten

Spencer Reis (1997, birthday), son of Jeff & Anita Reis, brother of Ryan Reis and Josh Reis

Jeff Palluzzo (1967, birthday), son of Fran Palluzzo

6    Michael Eichenbaum (birthday), son of Linda & Lee Eichenbaum

      Cliff Leslie (2000, passing), son of Yvonne and brother of Jamy Leslie and Jacob Leslie

Jesse Radowitz (2007, passing), son of Sherry & Stu Radowitz

Christina Angelo (2010, passing), daughter of Aileen & Joseph Angelo

Jennifer Jiminez (2010, passing), sister of Julianne Jiminez

Cody McKenzie Gainey (2011, passing), son of Michelle Wright

Joseph Janssen (2013, passing), son of Mike Janssen

7    Nicholas Cibelli (2010, passing), son of Pam Cibelli, brother of Michelle and Jen Cibelli

Alan Millman (1968, passing), son of Stecia Millman

8    Keith Costigan (1998, passing), son of Kathie Costigan

      Adam Rayman (2004, passing), son of Anita & Harry Rayman

      Adam Zdunczyk (2008, passing), son of Kathy Zdunczyk

      Ryan Groh (1993, birthday), son of Lisa Groh

      Brandon Peykar (1980, birthday), brother of Jennifer Kamin Peykar

      Josh Sutton (2013, passing), brother of Jennifer Sutton

      Gwyn Sullivan (2012, passing), daughter of Joan Marlow

9    Steven Goldberg (1969, birthday), son of Carol Goldberg

Jay Jiminez (1979, birthday), son of Liz Barbera

11  Donna Hope (1969, birthday), daughter of Ellen & Jack Krampf

Matthew Bell, Jr. (1994, birthday), son of Matthew Bell

12  Andrew Burrous (2011, passing), son of Kathy & Bob Burrous

13  Joseph Oliva (1991, birthday), son of Theresa Oliva

James Totans (2011, passing), son of Priscilla Apicella

Joe Olitt (1991, birthday), brother of Mike Olitt

Nicholas Reimuller (2012, passing), son of Maureen Reimuller

Kevin Naccary (1968, birthday), brother of Meredith Van Schuyler

Lakeya Strickland (2015, passing), daughter of Lakesha Strickland

14  Howard Brodsky (1961, birthday), son of Harriet & Phillip Brodsky

Blaize Mansur (2013, passing), son of Stephanie Mansur, grandson of Wayne & Susan Mansur

Michael Bloomberg (1971, birthday), son of Sandi & Jerry Bloomberg

Lori Schiffer (2013, passing), daughter of Helen Goldstein

Isabella Contreras (2014, passing), daughter of Alex Contreras

15  Larry Finkel (2013, passing), son of Doris Finkel

Michael Trotta (1987, birthday), son of Jaclyn & Michael Trotta

Christopher Conklin (2014, passing), son of Gordon Conklin

16  Lonny Ostrofsky (2001, passing), son of Marilyn Ostrofsky

Staci Love (2002, passing), sister of Kim Erlich

Joseph Kenny (2014, passing), son of Kevin & Jo Kenny

17  Blaize Mansur (1994, birthday), son of Stephanie Mansur, grandson of Wayne & Susan Mansur

Blake Carlin (1997, birthday), son of Jacqueline Carlin

Shannon Fearon (1987, birthday), sister of Christine Himpler, sister of Catherine Krupp

Jeanine Pucci (1971, birthday), daughter of Bernadette Marino

18  Leonard Ross (2007, passing), son of Irwin & Barbara Ross

Samuel Hawkins (2008, passing), son of Abigail Hawkins

Rebecca Guerin (1970, birthday), daughter of Rose & James Guerin

Bobby Celentano (2005, passing), brother of Alyssa Celentano

Ryan Hannigan (1977, birthday), son of Anita & John Hannigan

19  Christopher J. Eisele (1985, birthday), son of John & Kathy Montoya

Michelle Bergman (2010, passing), daughter of Marc & Jean Levinn, sister of Sharri Chahalis

Dr. James Matthew Wiezorek (2013, passing), son of Mary Beringer

Kurt McAuliffe (2013, passing), son of Jeannie McAuliffe

Harriet Patronis (2015, passing), daughter of Despina Koukoulas

21  Brad Stoll (2008, passing), son of Lucy & Howard Stoll

Jacob Goodman (1988, birthday), son of Nancy Goodman

22  Michael Lombardo (1981, birthday), son of Fran Jennings

23  Daniel Milch (1980, birthday), son of Linda Milch

Dex Nuzzi (2011, passing), son of Robert Nuzzi

Walter Allen Harding, III (2013, passing), son of Delores Mower

24  Troup Risser (2006, passing), son of Wendy Holden

      Mario Guy Mendez (1968, birthday), son of Ellen Pontecorvo

      Adam Cohen (1974, birthday), son of Marilyn Cohen

Isabella Contreras (2006, birthday), daughter of Alex Contreras

25  Joshua Link (1980, birthday), son of Linda & Ron Link, brother of Sara Link & Eric Neisner

Dale Dampf (2010, passing), daughter of Paula Dampf

Larry Gnolfo (1961, birthday), son of Coral & Jim Gnolfo

Tiara Durham (1993, birthday), daughter of Tonya Durham

Jerry Hart (1975, birthday), son of Helen Geslak

26  Sharon Gallucci (2008, passing), daughter of Patti & Dave Greenberg, sister of Rob & Melanie Gallucci, Ben & Cheryl Greenberg, Patti & Dave Greenberg, and Marne & Alexander Smyles

Adam Stark (2001, passing), son of Candice & Jeff Stark, sister of Mariel Stark

Christopher F. Elshamy (1983, birthday), son of Haydee Santiago

David Tauber Wiener (1973, birthday), son of Phyllis Wiener

Kaeli Kramer (2009, passing), daughter of Linda & Peter Kramer

27  Michael Kwartler (2013, passing), son of Jeff Kwartler

James Zajicek (1980, birthday), son of Anna Zajicek

Johnathan Gonzales (2015, passing), son of Donna Gonzales

Michael Kwartler (2013, passing), son of Jeff Kwartler, brother of Jessica Kwartler

28  Eric Essman (2000, passing), son of Sage Essman

Leonard Ross (1979, birthday), son of Irwin & Barbara Ross

Sean Egan (1983, birthday), son of Ellen Seibert, brother of Paige Seibert

Joanna Elizabeth Johnson (1990, birthday), daughter of Donna Johnson and Jake Johnson, sister of Laura Johnson

Rebekah Frucht (2012, passing), daughter of Morty Frucht, sister of Joseph Frucht

Thomas Reynolds (1998, birthday), son of Lisa Reynolds

Marco Caban (1966, birthday), father of Jessica Caban, husband of Sylvia Caban

Jacqueline Groody (1993, birthday), daughter of Tammy Groody

Mitchell Lippman (1958, birthday), son of Mona Zenke

Elisheva Basya (2010, passing), daughter of Sarah Lerner

Johnathan Gonzales (1983, birthday), son of Donna Gonzales

Laura Elizabeth Giampino (2007, passing), daughter of Caryn Pesce

29  Sydney Gross (1990, birthday), daughter of Lori Duckstein, sister of Stephanie and Stuart Gross

Fran Sharp Auslander (1978, birthday), daughter of Robert & Arlene Sharp, sister of Ari Sharp and Elissa & Shaun Sharp

      Robert Kevin O’Hara (2011, passing), son of Patricia O’Hara

Mark Edwin Fant (1959, birthday), son of Winnie Fant

30  Larry Yerys (1971, birthday), son of Abbey & Paul Yerys, brother of Ben Yerys

Susan Shapiro (1961, birthday), sister of Joan Shapiro

Eric Schalet (1962, birthday), son of Sandra Protass

31  Yaacov (Jake) Soffer Levy and Shlomo (Sol) Levy (1997, passing), son and husband of Barbara Levy

Daniel Weiss (2009, passing), son of Hannah Weiss

      Michael Aaron Neeley (2006, passing), son of Joy Neeley

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COPE Parent Column

May 2016

 Where did the 20 years go?

Sean P. Russo October 11, 1971 to April 26, 2011

I would like to share this poem with the moms out there who are hurting on the loss of their child. – Genia Salitra Belkin

Cope Gives Us Hope.

A Special Sign

Search for a rainbow

Search for that bright star

Search for that beautiful butterfly

So close yet so far.

My son will send me a sign

That will look me right in the eye

That will be your special way of saying

Mom, it’s me, Please don’t cry.

And then I’ll hear your favorite song by

Prince on the radio or I’ll remember something

Special just the two of us would do.

It’s not a dream, its really true

So I’ll be waiting for my sign that you’re

Working so hard for me to see.

I will never stop believing because

I can hear your voice saying

Mom, I’m here. It’s really me.

———————–

My son Tom passed when he was 38.  His birthday is April 21st and he would have been 44 years old.  To make matters harder to deal with I buried him on my birthday almost 6 years ago.  My birthdays are no longer happy and I am not the same person I was when he was alive.  Somehow someway in this “new” smile that drapes my face, I am trying to find happiness behind it.

I know this I can share with all of you.

He looked a little like Rob Lowe but was better looking then the actor and brilliant. He redesigned the tracks for the LIRR and then went upstairs and taught the programmers how to use his program. He also rewrote the program for the Israeli transit system– he wrote the programs for the programmers.  He was a Hofstra graduate and after Hofstra went to Farmingdale to learn how to be a programmer when no one knew what a programmer was – graduated with a 4.0 and they asked him to teach at Farmingdale.  He did subsequently teach programming in Texas. He was instrumental in inventing Win-TV many years ago.  He was a quiet humble yet funny guy.  Just don’t bring in religion or politics – he always won the argument…Thank you for allowing me to reminisce about my wonderful days with my Tom.  He was my middle son.  We all feel the loss of such a great man.

Thank you,

Janet Shavel

To share your thoughts about this posting, please click here to visit our website and enter your comment under the LEAVE A REPLY section.

Please share with us your writings about your child. Email Stacey at scareri@copefoundation.org for more information.

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COPE Sibling Column

May 2016

Our son Michael Scarabino was 16 when he lost his sister, our precious daughter Jaclyn Scarabino, four years ago this July 13th from a heroin overdose. She was only 24. His older brother Ricky played guitar and that piqued Michael’s interest. Between his sister’s love for music and his brother’s influence, he taught himself how to play the guitar, piano and to read/write music. Not long after losing his sister, he started writing songs, it was cathartic for him. He built an electric guitar naming it “Glitter Angel” for Jaclyn. He copyrighted a total of six songs that he wrote, sings and plays guitar and piano, and reflect his emotions during his grieving. He then went on to network with others, found a drummer and bassist, and production company that helped him produce a CD named “Unreckoned Reality” by Scarabino. The CD came out this week and is available on iTunes. He did this all on his own, we are so proud of our son.

This is what he wrote on Facebook when he launched the CD this week:

Unreckoned Reality is available now, happy release day everyone! I’d like to take this moment to say that there are so many people to thank. We say that it “takes a village to raise a child.” I believe that it takes a village to make a vision come to life. It took years of practice and dedication to get to this level, and it took a team of engineers, managers, creatives, and supporters to allow this record to be created. I thank you all who have supported me so far, however I will only mention one name in this post. This record is dedicated to my sister Jaclyn, who we lost 4 years ago, she is the reason for whom I have become, and a big part of the mood set in some songs. With Jaclyn in my heart and mind forever, I plan on taking these songs to the stage to express the attitude and words that cannot be simply spoken, and throw out every ounce of enthusiasm and energy that everyone wants to feel during a show.

I hope you enjoy Unreckoned Reality and rock out to it as much as I do, and before you know it, we’ll be tearing venues apart together. Thank you and see you all soon!

Click here to purchase the CD.

Please share with us your writings about your sibling. Email Stacey at scareri@copefoundation.org for more information.

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COPE News

If anyone has any news to share with the group or a poem or inspirational story (to potentially be included in a future newsletter if you wish), please email Stacey at scareri@copefoundation.org.

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Camp Erin® NYC – COPE Foundation

For the Latest News About COPE Camp Erin New York City!

August 26 – 28, 2016

Camp Erin New York City- COPE Foundation, a FREE bereavement camp for children ages 6-17 dealing with a major loss, is scheduled for August 26th – 28th, 2016, at Camp Wayne, in PA, on the New York State border.

For more information on Camp Erin, volunteering, or for registration materials, please email COPE-Camp Erin New York City Camp Director Ann Fuchs at afuchs@copefoundation.org or

914-552-6919.

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Monday Night South Shore Parent Support – Merrick

Merrick Jewish Center

Monday, May 2nd at 7:00 p.m. SHARP

Join COPE and social worker Judy Hasnas for our South Shore Parent Support Group meeting on Monday, April 4th from 7:00 – 8:30 p.m. SHARP at the Merrick Jewish Center (in the LIBRARY unless otherwise noted) which is located at 225 Fox Boulevard Merrick, NY. This group meets one Monday evening of the month at this time. Judy Hasnas, LCSW, BCD, has a private practice in Bellmore, New York, and facilitated bereavement groups for parents of fire fighters who were killed on 9/11 as part of the Counseling Service Unit, FDNY.  She also worked as an independent contractor at the Steinway Child and Family Service of Howard Beach and was a social work coordinator at Bellevue Hospital Center.

For more information, please email Stacey at scareri@copefoundation.org.

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Monday Night Parent Support Group for Parents New to COPE – East Meadow

COPE House at Eisenhower Park in East Meadow (Field 6A)

Monday, May 2nd at 7:00 p.m. SHARP

The Monday night COPE North Shore group for parents NEW TO COPE will meet this month on Monday, May 2nd from 7:00 – 8:30 p.m. This group will be facilitated by Marilyn Kohn, LCSW, and will be held at the COPE House in Eisenhower Park, East Meadow NY at Field 6A. For directions, please visit our website at www.copefoundation.org or email scareri@copefoundation.org.

For more information, please email Stacey at scareri@copefoundation.org.

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NEW Tuesday DAYTIME Parent Support Group – East Meadow

COPE House at Eisenhower Park in East Meadow (Field 6A)

Tuesday, May 3rd at 1:00 p.m. SHARP

The NEW DAYTIME Parent Support Group which normally meets the first Tuesday of the month at the COPE House at Eisenhower Park (Field 6A) in East Meadow will meet next on Tuesday, May 3rd from 1:00 – 2:30 p.m. The group is facilitated by licensed social worker Janet Zimmerman. Janet is currently in private practice as a psychotherapist. She previously ran bereavement groups for the Mid-Island JCC and has been a social worker for almost 40 years. For more information or to express your interest, please contact Amy Olshever, COPE Clinical Director, at 516-418-6606.

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Wednesday Night Western Suffolk County Parent Support Group – Dix Hills

The Chai Center in Dix Hills

Wednesday, May 11th at 7:00 p.m. SHARP

Please join COPE and social worker Denise Fields for our Parent Support Group in Suffolk County, at the Chai Center in Dix Hills (501 Vanderbilt Parkway). This group meets next on Wednesday, May 11th from 7:00 – 8:30 p.m. Denise has a private psychotherapy practice in Dix Hills, specializing in bereavement.  She previously was a consultant to the Huntington School district, and ran bereavement groups for the Family Service League in Huntington.  The group normally meets the second Wednesday evening of every month from 7:00-8:30 p.m.

For more information, please email Stacey at scareri@copefoundation.org.

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Monday Night Parent Support Group – East Meadow

COPE House at Eisenhower Park in East Meadow (Field 6A)

Monday, May 16th at 7:30 p.m. SHARP

The Monday night COPE North Shore group will meet this month on Monday, May 16th from 7:30 – 9:00 p.m. This group will be facilitated by Marilyn Kohn, LCSW, and will be held at the COPE House in Eisenhower Park, East Meadow NY at Field 6A. For directions, please visit our website at www.copefoundation.org or email scareri@copefoundation.org. This group is for parents who have been part of COPE. New to COPE parents should plan on attending the other Monday night meeting on May 2nd.

For more information, please email Stacey at scareri@copefoundation.org.

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Thursday Night North Shore Parent Support Group for Established Parents – Syosset

Syosset Library

Thursday, May 19th at 7:00 p.m. SHARP

Join COPE for our Two-Year Plus North Shore Parent Support Group meeting on Thursday, May 19th at 7:00 – 8:30 p.m. SHARP at the Syosset Public Library (225 So. Oyster Bay Road).

COPE will once again be joined by Marilyn Kohn, LCSW, a licensed social worker with a private practice specializing in bereavement counseling and individual and family therapy.   This is a group intended for parents whose loss occurred over two years ago. Newly bereaved parents should feel free to attend one of COPE’s other support groups.

The second group, at the Jericho Public Library in Jericho (1 Merry Lane) is now for parents new to COPE.

For more information, please email Stacey at scareri@copefoundation.org.

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Thursday Night North Shore Parent Support Group for Parents New to COPE – Jericho

Jericho Library

Thursday, May 12th at 7:00 p.m. SHARP

Parents NEW TO COPE, please join us for our North Shore Parent Support Group meeting on Thursday, May 12th from 7:00 – 8:30 p.m. SHARP at the Jericho Public Library (1 Merry Lane in Jericho).

This group, which meets monthly, is facilitated by Marilyn Kohn, LCSW, a licensed social worker with a private practice specializing in bereavement counseling and individual and family therapy. This is for parents NEW TO COPE, as Marilyn’s other Thursday and Monday groups are filled at this time.

For more information, please email Stacey at scareri@copefoundation.org.

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Bi-Monthly Grandparents Support Group – East Meadow

COPE House at Eisenhower Park in East Meadow (Field 6A)

Tuesday May 10th at 6:30 PM

COPE has started up a new group for bereaved parents who have lost adult children with children. This group will meet on Tuesday, May 10th from 6:30-8:00 p.m. and will be facilitated by Lisa Vitucci. Parents will discuss the dynamics involved dealing with grandchildren and their surviving parent and share their stories and issues they may have in this different family relationship. Suggestions can be made as to how to deal with these issues Lisa has more than ten years’ experience as a bereavement social worker for a hospice agency and is currently the Director of Social Work at ProHEALTH Care Support. Lisa can be reached with any questions at 516-808-5821.

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Friday Night Central Suffolk County Parent Support Group – Ronkonkoma

United Methodist Church in Ronkonkoma

Friday, May 27th at 7:00 p.m. SHARP

Please join COPE and social worker Lisa Vitucci for our NEW Central Suffolk County Parent Support Group at the United Methodist Church in Ronkonkoma (792 Hawkins Avenue Lake Grove, NY 11755, 631-588-5856). This group will meet next on Friday, May 27th at 7:00 – 8:30 p.m. Lisa has more than ten years’ experience as a bereavement social worker for a hospice agency and is currently the Director of Social Work at ProHEALTH Care Support. Lisa can be reached with any questions at 516-808-5821.

For more information or to express interest in this group, please email Stacey at scareri@copefoundation.org.

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Tuesday Night Long Island Adult Sibling Group – East Meadow

COPE House at Eisenhower Park in East Meadow (Field 6A)

Tuesday, May 31st at 7:00 p.m. (NOTE: Group Now Meeting on Tuesdays)

Please join COPE for our adult sibling group on Long Island on Tuesday, May 24th from 7:00 – 8:30 p.m. at the COPE House in East Meadow. For directions, please visit our website at www.copefoundation.org or email scareri@copefoundation.org. The group will be facilitated by licensed social worker Amy Kirschenblatt. Amy is a social worker with EDTC (Eating Disorders Treatment Collaborative) in Jericho, NY. Previously, she worked in a prenatal care program at NSHS/LIJ.

For more information, please email Stacey at scareri@copefoundation.org.

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Teen Grief Support Group (13-17) – East Meadow

COPE House in East Meadow

Thursday, May 12th at 7:00 p.m. SHARP

Teens that have lost a sibling, parent, or significant loved one…. If you are interested in attending the new COPE Teen Grief Support Group the second Thursday evening of every month at 7:00 p.m. at the COPE House in East Meadow, please express your interest to Clinical Director Amy Olshever at 516-418-6606. The next meeting of the group will be May 12th at 7:00 p.m.

The group is facilitated by licensed social worker Jennifer Plunkett. Jennifer is currently a psychotherapist with a private practice in Huntington where she specializes in treating adolescents, and an adjunct instructor at Suffolk Community College where she teaches courses in Child & Adolescent Psychology. Jennifer previously served as a bereavement specialist at Good Shepherd Hospice. There will also be a weekly social media component involved between the meetings. There is no cost to participate in this program.

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NYC Parent Support Group

1177 Avenue of the Americas @46th Street

ON HIATUS

The New York City parent group, facilitated by social worker Bridgette Boucher, which met on the second Tuesday of every month at 1177 Avenue of the Americas at 46th Street floor C-2, Suite 0020 from 7:00-8:30 p.m. is CURRENTLY ON HIATUS awaiting additional interest. If you know of anyone interested in this group, please contact COPE Clinical Director Amy Olshever at amyolshever@copefoundation.org.

Bridgette is currently a family therapist working with the Sloan Kettering Cancer Center and has a private practice in New York City. She was previously a therapist for the Ackerman Institute for the Family, treating families dealing with grief, substance abuse, domestic violence, trauma and relationship problems. For more information, please contact Bridgette at boucher9175@gmail.com.

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NYC Young Adult Sibling Support Group –

Express Interest Now

Location TBD in Manhattan – Looking for Space

The COPE young adult sibling support group in Manhattan is going to be starting up again soon! If you are an adult sibling interested in attending, please email Karen Flyer at Karen@copefoundation.org. The group will likely meet on the 1st or 3rd Wednesday evening of the month, with exact date and time determined by facilitator and space availability.

We are looking for office space to hold our group. If you work in an office in Manhattan that would have space we could borrow one night per month, please let Karen know. The space does need to be large – the group tends to have 6-10 people. A licensed social worker employed by COPE would be running the group.

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Young Children’s Grief Support Group (Ages ~7-12)

COPE House in East Meadow

ON HIATUS

The Children’s Grief Support Group for kids ages 7-12 living with the loss of a loved one is on hiatus due to lack of enrollment. If you are interested in your child joining an 8-week spring group, please contact COPE Clinical Director Amy Olshever at 516-418-6606 or amyolshever@copefoundation.org.

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Monthly Meditation

COPE House at Eisenhower Park in East Meadow (Field 6A)

TBA

The Monthly Meditation Group takes the place of the Spirituality Circle. Monthly Meditations will meet at the COPE House in Eisenhower Park in East Meadow.   Since space is limited please RSVP.

COPE hopes that all parents interested in meditation as an integral part of the healing process will attend these monthly get-togethers. Some months will include guest speakers and healers. If you have any questions, please contact Lilly Julien at ljulien5@gmail.com.

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Expressive Art Workshop

COPE House at Eisenhower Park in East Meadow (Field 6A)

TBA

The COPE Expressive Art Workshop meets monthly at the COPE House in Eisenhower Park in East Meadow. You do NOT have to be an artist or have artistic “talent” to participate.

For more information, please email Lilly Julien at ljulien5@gmail.com.

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Integrative Healing Workshop Series

Supplementing Sensibly: How to Fill Nutritional Gaps for Optimal Health

Sunday, May 15, 2016 2:00PM, COPE House in Eisenhower Park

Nutrition plays a vital role in our physical and emotional well-being. When confronted with trauma, nourishing ourselves is critical for the healing process. This workshop will focus on optimizing health through food and nutritional supplements.

Dr. Rick Shields is a NYS certified nutritionist with 25 years of experience as a clinician, guest speaker, and writer. Most recently, he authored the popular, inspirational book L’Chaim: 18 Chapters to Live By, which incorporates meal plans, recipes, practical takeaway tips and stories that help turn healthy lifestyle changes and weight loss into achievable goals. Dr. Shields has taught at N.Y.U. and developed a line of scientifically advanced nutritional supplements.

Please RSVP to Stacey at SCareri@copefoundation.org by May 8th.

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COPE’s 10th Annual Golf Outing

Monday, May 23, 2016

The Muttontown Club

Honoree: Judy Jacobs, Nassau County Legislator

COPE Parent Recognition Award: Donna Cooperman

Professional Service Award: Dr. Norman Fried

Please REGISTER NOW for our tenth annual COPE golf outing on Monday, May 23, 2016 at the Muttontown Club in East Norwich! Sponsorship opportunities are now open, and you can register for the event by clicking here. If you would like to volunteer at the event please click here. If you have any questions about registration and sponsorship opportunities, please contact Karen Flyer, COPE Executive Director, at karen@copefoundation.org.

Memorial opportunities are available to honor your child or sibling through a tee sign. Please consider this tribute to memorialize your child.

Funds raised from the event will enable COPE to develop and expand its programming and outreach and fund COPE’s support groups, workshops and events, and to support Camp Erin® NYC (August 26 – 28, 2016). The golf outing is an important event for the organization, and we hope that COPE parents and siblings can be involved in making the golf outing a success.

Want some ideas on how you can help with the event?

  1. Help COPE secure raffle and silent auction items (contact Karen Flyer for outreach letter and forms). DUE MAY 1ST
  2. Volunteer to work at the outing (shifts available from 9am-9pm).
  3. Register to play golf ($425).
  4. Attend the cocktail hour or dinner ($175).
  5. Sponsor a tee sign in memory of your child or sibling ($100 or $250).
  6. Buy raffle tickets for the event (pre-event raffle: 3 for $25, 7 for $50 or 15 for $100). Chinese Auction at the event.
  7. Make a general donation (stock transfers are an option).
  8. Encourage friends and family to attend, support or donate to the event.

If you have any questions about registration and sponsorship opportunities, please contact Karen Flyer, COPE Executive Director, at karen@copefoundation.org.

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Community Events

The 4th Annual Music Heals the Heart fundraiser in memory of Eric C. Doll is on Sunday, May 1st from 2:00 -6:00PM.

The proceeds from the raffle sales will be donated to COPE. The proceeds from the door and t-shirt sales are donated to the Eric Doll Scholarship at Calhoun High School, and the LI American Foundation for Suicide Prevention Chapter.

4th Annual Music Heals the Heart Fundraiser

When: Sunday, May 1st  from 2-6pm

Where: Westbury Friends Community Center (Westbury Friends School)

550 Post Ave., Westbury, NY

Entrance Fee: $20.00

To donate or purchase tickets visit: https://lifgc.com/new_pages/events.html

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On Saturday, May 7th, 2016 Angela’s House will be hosting their 1st Annual Walk aptly titled: Angel of Hope: A Walk to Remember. This event will take place at Eisenhower Park, where the Angel of Hope statue has stood since 2008.

Registration for the event will begin promptly at 9:30am at the Kite Field, located next to the statue, which is located in the Veterans Memorial section of Eisenhower Park. (Parking field 6 is the ideal location to park.)

Click here https://www.angelashouse.org/save-date-angel-hope-walk-to-remember/ for more information.

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COPE Individual Support, or “Buddy System”

For those bereaved parents and siblings not ready for a support group, or who wish to augment their support group experience with individual support, COPE offers a “buddy system.” If you are in need of a buddy (a parent or sibling who shares your particular loss), OR if you wish to act as a buddy to a newly bereaved parent or sibling, please contact Stacey Careri at scareri@copefoundation.org. Peer support is truly at the heart of COPE!

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COPE Donations

We thank the following people for making donations to COPE during the months of (late) March and April:

General Donations

  • Miriam Lasker
  • Jane Goldman
  • Esther Bogin
  • Wendy Smith
  • The Sklar Family Foundation
  • George & Cathy Lohmann
  • Zina Klein
  • Robyn Yaker
  • Cheryl Levy
  • Lynne & Mark Slovin
  • Brian & Robin Potash
  • Marika Spizz
  • Linda Juergens
  • Jim & Nancy Shalek
  • Frank & Therese Ubriaco
  • Lorie Slutksy
  • Stacey Husted
  • Sarah & Michael Connolly
  • Jocelyn Migliacci
  • Lilibeth Felisarta
  • Andrew & Dona Brucker
  • Andrea Diamond
  • Andrew Bogin
  • NY Life Insurance Company
  • Norman Morgan
  • Steven Bogin
  • Samuel B. Chisolm
  • Katherine Sayer
  • Mike & Marisa Dicintro
  • Channah Gray
  • Timeless Designs by Jacob Bryan
  • Vivien & Richard Lobell
  • Lisa & Michael B. Cooperman
  • Gary Chipurnoi
  • Jack Humphrey
  • Sylvia & Joseph Yasgur
  • Marlene Buchwald
  • Daniel Migliacci
  • Melanie Arigo
  • Esther Romer Weinberg

Labyrinth

  • Esther & Larry Wynn
  • Brenda & Carlin Axelrod
  • Rose & David Anolik
  • Helena & Victor Zelmanovich
  • Selva Herrara-Pagan
  • June Stelboum
  • Brenda & Marty Kelly
  • Sondra & Kenneth Wolfson
  • Jeanne & William Dione
  • Sandy Wolkoff
  • Laura Failla

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If you no longer wish to receive these newsletters, please email Stacey at scareri@copefoundation.org.

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COPE Foundation

P.O. Box 1251

Melville, NY 11747

Tel: (516) 484-4993, Fax: 516-484-4885

Email: scareri@copefoundation.org

www.copefoundation.org